Hi. Having read Mrs Piggle-Wiggle to Sunny recently, I have all the cures in my head, and though I wish I could remember her funny ways and sense of humor when I find myself sucked into a deep hole of logic with her( 6 going on 16), I came up with one in an effort to keep two chins up through dinner to make for a successful bedtime after a long weekend.
Because there were requests for more, "Mama, it's like a series, and every day you can tell us another one!", and because the eyes were the size of quarters and there were questions asked such as, "Really, did this really happen?", I feel compelled to share.
So, here's sort of what I came up with:
"It was another morning at the Miller's home when Mrs. Miller called up to Sarah as it was time to wake. "Sarah, time to wake for school!"
To which Sarah replied, "I don't like going to school."
To make a long story short, her morning consisted of comments such as: "My feet are too cold, my jacket is too small, my toothbrush doesn't work, your pancakes are too flat, why must I have peanut butter and jam in my lunch again?!", and the like.
After Sarah Miller had gone off to school, Mrs. Miller called Mrs. Whereabouts and asked her how mornings were going with Guinevere. Mrs. Whereabouts said, "Oh, well, you know, our mornings are such a delight for Guinevere does never complain, she always irons her stockings, her bed is always made, she smiles so prim and proper, her ribbons are always square, and that is, because, as you know, she is quite perfect."
"and no fun", thought Mrs. Miller.
"Yes, of course, thank you for your time.", said Mrs Miller and she quickly hung up the phone only to pick it back up to ring Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy for she knew the success Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy had for all matters related to children.
"Haloo", replied Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy, "I was expecting you for Sarah Miller was here just yesterday complaining her way through the afternoon."
"Well", said Mrs. Miller, "I just can't take it another second, you must have a cure for the likes of Sarah Miller."
"Indeed I do", said Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy, "it is the Complaining Nose-Grower Cure". "Here is what you must do: while Sarah Miller is still asleep and snoring with her mouth hanging wide open, you quietly climb the stairs, tip-toe into her room, and let one drop per each of her years into her mouth hanging wide open, and quickly retreat downstairs. She will soon find the most peculiar feeling in her nose when she begins to complain upon waking. If you are not experiencing any relief within four days, you may bring your Sarah Miller directly to me."
Mrs. Miller hung up the phone and in an instant, was down the street at Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy's house to pick up the Complaining Nose-Grower Cure. At dawn the next morning she followed the instructions precisely and was remiss to hear Sarah Miller complain about her cold feet and small slippers upon waking. Sarah did notice, though, an odd tickly sensation in her nose after the complaints, but figured it was just an itch. Upon brushing her teeth for bed that night, she did think to herself, "I must have rubbed my nose too hard with the scratchy tissues at school because my nose seems a bit swollen."
The next day came and went, and after a long day of thoughts spoken out loud such as: "I'm not writing with a brown pencil, how come my sweater isn't as pretty as yours, why do you get to dress so fancy, and, this broccoli is too broccoli-ish", Sarah Miller had noticed her nose had begun to grow. Not knowing what was wrong, she began to cover her longish nose with a handkerchief hoping noone would notice.
The third day came, and upon looking in the mirror Sarah Miller saw that her nose had expanded yet again. She was so distraught at the new growth she was experiencing, she said not a word the whole day. That night, no new growth.
On the fourth morning, Sarah turned quickly in her closet to find the right dress for the day, and painfully knocked her nose right into the doorjam as she complained to her mother that her striped stockings do not go with her flower and star dress. It was just at that moment Sarah realized the connection between her nose growth and the complaining she was doing.
By the fifth morning, Sarah Millers nose had returned to its normal size, and the Miller household had returned to its happy and pleasant self. Mrs. Miller was pleased to have her kind and polite daughter back and Mrs. Higgedy-Piggedy was delighted her Complaining Nose-Grower Cure had worked once again.
